Freefall

I jumped
my first sense
desperate regret
arms and legs flailing,
trying to slow my descent
reaching back
no, this is not what I meant
not what I want.

Lying below, a splattered self
now my arms are still
my legs motionless
resolved;
that is me
awaiting the end.

Flashing snippets
of the past five years
memories seeking,
then finding
a way
to freedom.....
to live on
in another
and not perish in the spirit
lying motionless,
breathless,
lifeless,
on the ground below.

Awake again,
still alone,
a single choice
in the dark;
to watch the freefall unfold
from above
or below.