Jimmy Soul

We are at it again, the Detroit Red Wings coasting their way to yet another Stanley Cup and once again, fighting off not only the rag-tag collection of Sharks' opposition, but also the concerted effort of the National Hockey League to avoid the embarrassment of the Wings owning Lord Stanley' silver trophy.

Unlike last year, this year's Wings are too good, too talented, too deep and too loved for the forces of evil to rid themselves of so easily.  Not surprisingly, the league has responded this year by hiring out the Illuminati and Free Masons to lay in wait behind the shadowy caverns of the ice arenas, a la Tonya Harding*

• Tonya Maxene^[1] Harding (born November 12, 1970) is an American figure skating champion. In 1991 she won the U.S. Figure Skating Championships and placed second in the World Championships. She was the second woman, and the first American woman, to complete a triple axel jump in competition.
• She became notorious after her ex-husband, Jeff Gillooly, conspired with Shawn Eckhardt^[2] and Shane Stant to attack her skating competitor Nancy Kerrigan at a practice session, during the 1994 U.S. Figure Skating Championships.

Speaking of man-love, this series will provide the treat of watching Red Wing forward Pavel Datsyuk who will show exactly how the game of ice hockey should be played; with eloquence, style and speed.

As I post this, the first period of today's game has just ended with the Illuminati ahead 1-0. There were five penalties called in the first period, that's 10 of the 20 total minutes of the period being played by special teams.  No one can beat the WIngs 5 on 5, so its a good strategy for those who would seek to deny destiny.

Ah, destiny......when will they ever learn, when will I ever learn.