Tuesday, February 23, 2010

From an aching heart

I wish you would write back to me.  So much time has gone by, so many of our memories now faded, blurred by the years that passed.  We were stick figures along a southeastern shore  and then travelers across the great plains, Mt Rushmore, Yellowstone and the long open expanses of Montana.  We laughed, held and loved each other as the old was left behind and the new discovered.

Then we passed through the upheaval....but in the end, didn't survive.

Three years have passed and we both had moved on. Others took our places, the ones we had promised, bonded and sealed forever for you and me.  And when I thought those feelings were gone, that maybe they weren't ever real at all,  one day a voice with your name came through my iPhone and in an awkward panic, I was a stranger onto you.

A month has now passed and I wanted to say I'm sorry.  Those special feelings never ended and my love for what we had will stay with me as a treasure of my life.  As my end comes closer, a certain clarity shines through, the times and souls that touched us, touched me, changed me, loved me; they will forever be with me.

Yes, you are there.  Please don't take that distance last month as anything but a tired old soul hiding from his heart.

After all the loves of my life, after all the loves of my life, I'll be thinking of you......
and wondering, why?


A

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

The Beach Boys - Wouldn't it be nice

A great flame follows a little spark.
~ Dante (Ital. 1265-1321)

quia non erit inpossibile apud Deum omne verbum

dixit autem Maria ecce ancilla Domini fiat mihi secundum verbum tuum et discessit ab illa angelus

Anonymous said...

hit redial on the iphone dude, and throw it out there.

Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.

Anonymous said...

Smoke a bowl, drink some great whiskey, count your money, and have sex with a younger woman...

That should cure it.


Hunter

David Corry said...

the BIGGEST mistake a man can make is being AFRAID to make a mistake ! in the LEVELS of life....LOVE TRUMPS ALL....stocks are NOT anywhere near that level.... GO GET HER ALLAN !

David

Anonymous said...

"Tired old soul hiding from his heart" is a place that does not easily allow one to escape its darkness.

Anonymous said...

Are you referring to NNVC?

Anonymous said...

Allan,

Thought about this for a few hours so, here goes:

If time grows short, then the time for sorrow is at an end, and the time for action is at hand.

Travel to where she is, and THEN say you are sorry.

Tell her you came to say that face to face, and then go home. Then she will understand that you really mean it. If she doesn't accept it, then you will know you did all you can. Only then, will you know peace.

Brian F.
El Paso, TX

PS: That which was so beautiful to us in our short lives would not have been so without all the hardship that accompanied it. This was the underlying message of J. R. R. Tolkien's works, especially The Simillarian.